Cat puke…

Why. Why do cats feel the need to clean themselves 24/7? I’m sure they know what they’re doing. I’m sure they know they are inhaling their own fur little at a time, eventually combusting later on. No one, that includes cats can eat too much hair. He must know he’ll eventually destroy our personal belongings with his disgusting feline fluids. So why does he do it? Why does he clean himself so much!

Is it because he is just OCD? A germaphobe? Maybe he would like to pull a Howie Mandell, and shave off all his fur. Heck I wouldn’t mind, that would mean less surprises…

Or maybe it is because he WANTS to destroy our crap! He walks around plotting his next move. We already know he likes attention, maybe he sees when were not paying attention to him, because lets face it, he’s not the center of the universe! Anyways maybe he sees this, and says when they aren’t looking, I’ll spill my entire stomach fluid onto their prized possesion, maybe then they’ll pay attention to me. My cat thinks he’s frickin’ God.

Why can’t he just puke in in his litter box? That would make everything oh so easier. That’s where he poops. Not pees. He also goes around our house finding special things of ours that he can urinate on, like ALL of our coats, and bags. Once he’s done with that, he wipes his butt on our carpet, like our carpet is his personal toilet paper. What a brat. We can’t punish him, and he knows it, so he continues to act all high and mighty. I’d rather have a bird. Maybe we should just get a dog. That way the cat will get punished. Don’t worry though, I wouldn’t let it get too out of hand.

Anyways, that was my OTHER rant of the day, Peace out.